Is the road clear now?

Now that CAT is over, i am Back to Blogging (B2B). Not that i was busy preparing for CAT, but i needed to give CAT some respect by atleast trying to show the world that i was not wasting my time blogging when i am supposed to slog over CAT. You got it! if not blogging, then..yah..! i did waste time over a lot of stuffs.. but i am not disclosing 'em right here. I am sure you wouldn't want to know how i waste my time. Ah! i am digressing. Let's get to the point. What i wanted to blog today was about my confused state of affairs and also what happened at CAT and a bit of flashback, GRE and the future roadmap. I admit i robbed the idea of this blog title from Harsha.. but i know he won't mind. No more digressing.

Speeding back to the third year of BITS, i remember distinctly that i was very clear as to what i wanted to do in my life. I had infact fabricated a perfect (i know it ain't perfect, coz it didn't work out) .so... ahem..correction.. not so perfect roadmap of my future career.It was something like this - Do masters, then work somewhere in US of A, then tackle an MBA and do a management stint somewhere.. not exactly somewhere.. P&G was my dream... now you know why i use dove and colgate.. :) .. After these major roles, i had decided to open something of my own.. not at US of A... but at India.. All these seemed very easy and practical at third year of college. But it started bombing off rather too fast.. It started to tumble first with my exceptional grades in CDC's and then GRE. Cramming up all the Barron words failed to help me as I didn't get any words from them.. but instead from Big Book. Well.. i pretty much made a disaster out of GRE and decided to kick out my first destination in the roadmap - MS. Now i wanted to bell the CAT.

It was a good decision of mine to think of something like CAT.. but only the time i decided to bell was wrong.. Thinking of CAT just 3 months before it ain't exactly the brilliant idea. But i thought i should be the exception.. (** stops to get a good laugh**) .. I didn't anyway.. I know i can put the blame on my office work.. but i won't do that.. i would just say that the cat escaped my grasps. My hands are quite slipperly. I am sure this justifies why i didn't do well.

So where am i standing now?

Nowhere. I am still sitting at office and trust me- I am mighty thankful of it! In the times of pink slip atmosphere, one really needs to be thankful to be earning enough to sustain peacefully.
So i know i am stuck here for atleast an year. I was hoping for the cat to liberate me next july, but the cat died and i might have to be here even next july and the year next..! oh no! Hopefully not. Cuz i have already started the next show, GMAT :-)

In the meanwhile, i have learnt to see my roadmap in reverse. Start the entrepreneurship stint right now. When i say "now", it extends to a couple of years.. but i hope to see it shaping up.
The other reality of "now" is to switch off my mind from flashbacks and dreams and get back to the "now" world of coding.

farms and dreams

Couple o' years back,i had gone to Sriperumbudur, which is near Chennai. Its a beautiful place. Full of lush green fields, lots of trees-covering both sides of the road, cows and goats grazing lazily in the fields, farmers working on their crops, women balancing the sheaf of paddy and sugarcanes on their head, a lovely cool breeze that makes our heart feel elated.. a beauty!

We had gone there to meet our grandmother's friend. They lived in a huge farmhouse there. It was really amazing to be in that atmosphere, far away from pollution, traffic and noise! We were to stay there for the night. For sometime i sat with my grandma's friend, who was 80+ listening in awe to her amazing fables. She then talked about the farm and also about the silk factory they
owned.

Later i took the oppurtunity to explore the place.I decided to make my first visit to the silk factory. It wasn't exactly a factory, but more of an old house converted factory. Some 10 people were hard at work transforming the silk to sarees. The entire sight gave a shimmering look! I got some royal treatment there. I told them i wanted to try weaving. Soon i was actually weaving the silk threads myself! Feeling very happy i came out to explore the vast fields. I stood for sometime inhaling the beauty of nature and then i was in for some work..! I wanted to have a go at ploughing the field. The farmers said it wasn't a great idea and that i wouldn't have enough energy to lead the cows to plough the fields. But after my success at silk weaving i was adament and the poor farmers fearing the wrath of my host, let me lead one handle of the cows. I courageously stepped into the marshy area to pull the cows. I pulled with all force and they wouldn't budge. I tried 2 more times and the cows had enough of me. They suddenly turned back with a jerk and i lost balance and fell into the muddy waters. I looked a sight when i managed to get out from the mess. It was 10 minutes walk to the farmhouse and people on the way turned twice to see my disastrous visage!

I had a good wash and decided to end my adventures for the day and sat in the cosy hall of the old farm house.I saw TV for sometime and got bored. Everybody had left to visit some more neighbours. I went to the backyard and saw lots of seed packets.I decided to do
some gardening. It was almost dark but my enthusiasm didn't fade. I started to sow the seeds. I was so involved in it that i failed to notice i was nearing some prickly lemon trees. I totally got entangled in it and got scratched all over my face and hands. With great difficulty i managed to escape the clutch of the trees. Sigh! Another disaster.!

The next day was thankfully good. I had a good time building a bird table and feeding the birds, preparing some pongal with the farmers (it was during pongal yah!) and had fun playing with the kids around. when it was time to leave, there was heaviness in my heart.

It was such an amazing experience that everytime i pass a farmhouse, i remember my stay over Sriperumbudur. I hope i get to visit the place soon!

Drama all the way!!!

I had always wanted to blog this for quite some time.. and here it is!

The train of memories rewinds to second year, second sem (2'2). I distinctly remember this happened at VKD's, Intro to sys class. I quite forgot what class we had before IntroSys, but never mind! The story starts after that..!

So sometime in 2006..just before drifting to the sleepy mist of the IntroSys class, Sherin, Anandi and myself made our way to the IC to grab a cuppa elachi tea to beckon our conscience that had gone to sleep peacefully.. (nop.. i still don't remember what class was there before VKD's that had rocked us to sleep).. And just before we left, the delicious smell of fresh samosas magnetized us to the counter again. We got one each and it was then we realized that we were already late to the class by 10 mins. But our hearts wouldn't let us abondon the half savoured samosas.. So a brilliant idea struck us. To smuggle the samosas to the class well hidden in Sherin's jean pockets.

Poor gal! The samosas were not only oily but very hot too!! I should ask her if it left a scar on her..! On the way to the class which was at A block, Sherin even found time to propose to ..ahem.. her guy. (Yah! it was valentine's day!)

We raced to the class and i am surprised that VKD did not see the conspicuous samosa bulge in her jean..! The rarefied air conditioned atmosphere made the samosas quite.. or should i say, Sherin quite and then she soon drifted off to sleep. (I know, unlike her).. She only woke up to the calls of VKD after sometime...!

Truly a dramatic day to remember!!

What the world thinks....

I am at all contempt for the world around-
A world that does not permit a deviation of the norm.
Any breach of it pronounces doom for the doer-
For the reason that the world was not able to achieve the deviation.

Prestige now poses as the fountainhead,
The world is desperate to know what the world thinks-
Rather than what the self thinks.
This stops the progress of the humankind abruptly.

When the world gets a stand before the self,
The self is helpless.
It’s the act of majority against minority,
The world breeds pride, as it knows that the self never wins.

But when the self decides to take on the world,
The world mocks, ridicules, scorns and smirks.
The world laughs and tries to break the self from succeeding,
But the self persists.

When the self triumphs,
The world now regrets,
For its actions of the past has brought upon misery and wreckage,
Not on the norm breaker but on its own self.

I love JAVA

Just sit back, take a deep breathe and visualize this.
Its midnight. You are walking in the lonely highway. All is peaceful except for the chill whip of wind.
Suddenly from nowhere, a pack of ghastly dogs pounce on you from all sides. You are screaming. Wake up!

Going through the five day Java training delineates the dogs scenario. I was peaceful on the sunday before java monday. Monday did start with a cuppa coffee, not filter coffee, but JAVA coffee (with beans grinded). I remember getting excited when i got the "Head First JAVA" book. Wacky books boosts me up! I meant wacky seasoned with mighty smartness. I went ahead with a decent good pace. Finished 5 chapters in 2 days( for a JAVA fresher like me it is certainly hare pace). I was all in the optimistic wind till the moment arrived when the trainer finished watever i covered in 15 minutes flat!

Come on! This ain't justice! I spend 2 full days and she goes on to close it in 15 mins! All this time i was walking peacefully(doubts are always there), but i was calm. But at the 16th minute i was dead. Yah! its the Ghost of me blogging now. But i felt if i sit through the rest of this session, my ghost persona might also get killed.

Why is it that i cant sip (forget drink)JAVA but only BRU? Presently more bits are overhead than in head. I can't even go on to say "I don't give a damn!" coz i am expected to be a pro at it by the end o' the week!!
Presently i am in the process of analyzing the right brain patterns of the java consumers with non-java consumers. You are welcome to join me in this pursuit of coffee.

I am half way through the training and i know i will never live after that to blog. So give me your advance condolences.
I love JAVA!! (i meant the island!)

Lost in the rains - It happens only in India..!

It so happened that 2 ppl decided to plunge 'emselvs in shopping n games yesterday - Me and Sherin. When we started early from office for no other reason but this, we couldn't help observing the lovely patterns the clouds were making and the cool breeze that decided to entangle the hair while travellin' in d bus or the very slight drizzle that gave a invigorating feel. All was very well to keep up our spirits high till we reached KR puram. The rain took its claim and gave a heavy downpour. Still with umbrellas to our resuce,we stayed calm. But unfortunately we got down much ahead of our destination. We were walking to the side of the road- keeping out of the huge puddles that spread like a carpet before us. But what is the use of being careful? The motorcyclers and the auto drivers found pleasure in making their wheels depress through the deepest puddles near us and thereby having the fun of seeing our white dresses turn brown, with our faces and lappy bags not spared with wet mud. We could only curse and continue. Once we were at big bazaar, we exhausted ourselves aplenty. We went to the game zone and played ball games...egg games....video games and what not! All was fine inside the AC'nd zone that kept the outside temperament in dark. When we exited from the bazaar, the guards warned us to stay back till the rains subside. But we were adament enough to push our way out of the crowd gathered to find shelter from the extra heavy downpour. With our hands full of purchase covers and food(we had got parcel pepsi too), with the heavy lappy on our backs and the umbrella, we looked a sight! We struggled against the rains and strained our eyes to catch a sight of an auto. It was very dark and roads were flooded. We now didn't care a tuppence about our white attire. We waded through the waters with the umbrella in front to shield the sharp droplets making depression in our faces, we tried to stop an auto. We were almost standing in the middle of the road in an attempt to stop an vehicle. But we were highly unsucessful. The rains always increase the atrocity of the auto drivers. You should hear the exhorbitant amount they charge for going a short distance. Intially the autos we managed to halt demanded 100. then it went upto 120! By the time we decided we were ready to pay 100 bucks to save ourseleves from the brief storm, the autos deserted. The next couple o' autos refused to give us a ride. They preferred to take in families. What logic! I was splurting out so many curses that would have ruined a typical paradigm of what a iyer gal is. We were totally at a loss and even wondered whether we would reach our home at all. We could feel our mobiles vibrating and ringing in our wet hands, but with the load in our hand and the heavy rain, we couldn't even attend it causing nervousness to the people at the other end of the phone. We were fully drenched by the time we managed to get into an auto for 70 bucks. The auto journey too didn't provide much of a relief. Imagine the plight of an auto jammed between a huge truck carrying iron rods on one side and a bus on the other. I was showered with the occasional muddy water inside the vehicle more than once. And one more fear was making through the drilling waves in the roads. The auto's engine coughed and sneezed all the way. Imagine the relief we got when we reached near home. The auto driver cribbed and cursed us for asking him to take a particular route. If he didnt have to take the route we specified, why in the heaven's sake should he have taken it in the first case?
Finally! we made it. The pepsi like a waterbag, my pizza and finger fries floating in water and lappy bag carrying more than a kilogram of h2o!
Now, the important aspect that comes out of such an experience is the desire to bang the auto drivers on a sharp rock or alteast a wall. If they don't want to take in the people, why the hell should they drive at all? It doesn't make sense. It is acceptable to charge a lil extra in case of rains. But charging some crazy amount is damn crazy. Making their wheels splash the muddy waters on the poor pedestrians is another game they oughta stop playing! But waiting for the day these will be solved may just happen to be an illusion.! It..huh..happens only in India!!

Light..!

There are always the lights that you can depend upon-
In the moments of the silent distress...
There are always the lights that you can call anytime-
In the moments of solitude...
There are always the lights that you can celebrate with-
In the moments of the joy and ecstasy...
There are always the lights that you can ride with-
In the moments of relishing the goodness of nature...
The lights do not flash in the closeness of self,
But it always shines brightly in the closeness of the soul.